- "There's a guy crying in the Cleroux Collection at the Palisades. He keeps looking at a painting."
- —Stacey Forsythe
It involves talking with a severely upset man at the Palisades Mall art gallery, Cleroux Collection. Randolph Allen is crying about no one buying his painting and Chuck will have to buy it in order to save him.
Chuck is asked to investigate an art gallery where there appears to be a man sobbing. When Chuck makes it to the gallery he encounters the sad man. The man, who is identified as Randolph Allen, is apparently upset because all his art work, which he claims is his entire life's work, is pointless due to the outbreak. He asks Chuck to pay $3,000 dollars for his painting to make it have some purpose. Upon receiving the money he will suddenly change to a more positive attitude and can then be escorted back to the Safe House.
In Off the Record, Randolph appears at 5pm on the 25th of September instead of at 11am on the 27th.
Dialogue of the mission in the Off the Record game files. All text may not be actually used in the final game.
Stacey: There's a guy crying in the Cleroux Collection at the Palisades. He keeps looking at a painting.
Hey, buddy. Are you okay?
Do I look okay? This is my life's work?! This was my first painting to make it into a gallery! And now no one will ever buy it.
Listen, I'm sorry about that. But it's not safe out here. If you follow me -
No, no. You don't understand. It's not worth going on if I'm such a failure. If no one buys it, then I'll die with my dreams!
You're kidding, right? I think you got your priorities -
3000 bucks. That's how much my dreams cost. Take it or leave it. And please, please take it! PLEASE! Don't go. Buy my painting, it's a one of a kind!
PLEASE! I'm begging you. PLEASE!
It was my best piece. I poured my heart into it. Doesn't anyone want it?
All my life's work... for nothing. I'm such a failure.
There's no reason to go on. Like Van Gogh, maybe I'll only be recognized when I'm dead.
They said this one wasn't derivative. Is that why no one wants it? I'm too good!
I should have listened to my mother and become a lawyer.
These zombies don't know anything about good art! Why did this have to happen?
Please, don't denigrate my dreams! Anything less than $3000 means I'm not a true artist. I don't know why I even bother...
You've made my dreams come true! It's all yours. Now let's get the hell out of here! Those zombies wouldn't know art if it hit them over the head!
My first paycheck! Thanks to you, I found my fortune in Fortune.
- This mission is the only time during the game the Funny Painting becomes available.
- Keep in mind that Katey won't accept damaged gifts. If you are going for Father of the Year AND Slaughter - S = Laughter on the same playthrough, you'll need to use the Funny Painting as either your last gift to Katey or the last "novelty" weapon on the list. Either way, make sure you save before you use it; then, use it for one achievement, load your save, and use it towards the other.
- In Dead Rising 2: Off the Record, as Frank comes near The Cleroux Collection, he will comment "Oh geez, where's the cry baby?"